Love Is Keeping The Promise Anyway
by Beatles-McLennon
Summary: Erik snoops-and yes it is snooping-and finds something that alters his perfect view of Charles. It breaks his heart and causes him to make a promise that is impossible to keep. *Past Charles/OC* *Cherik Friendship*


The house-no mansion-was huge. Erik was sure it the biggest house he had ever been in willingly. The tour took hours but every room was so different and so beautiful to make him bored. Erik always couldn't help but notice the almost sad look Charles carried in his eyes, but the telepath simply smiled at him and Erik left him be. He wasn't the type to pry and he was sure Charles wasn't the type to tell, he was too charming and manipulative to reveal anything that could make his usually bright, dazzlingly eyes that dull.

So Erik left it alone.

Charles wasn't sad all the time, Erik observed. When he was with the kids the young English man smiled and laughed as if nothing weighed him down, like he was a carefree spirit playing with his siblings in the backyard. But sometimes, and only sometimes, Erik saw him alone. Alone and cold and his face was hardened and thoughtful and his eyes had lost the light Erik had felt at home and _not _alone looking into when they first met.

Erik debated on asking Raven what was eating the poor professor but he decided against it. He knew what inner demons looked like on the face, he had wasted hours staring at him own reflection, staring at his own dead eyes. He didn't want Charles to look like that though. Charles his brother, Charles the naïve wide-eyed leader of a family of outcasts and children.

It wasn't until Erik started snooping around the house that he started to understand. Well it wasn't actually snooping…..more curiously looking…that sounded much better Erik decided. He found it accidently anyway, he was walking and he found a room which he hadn't seen before. He walked in and found old photographs in an old box on the top right of an even older closet. Erik shifted through the photos with a calm expression. Photos of a young boy that Erik did recognise others were clearly of Raven and Charles. They both wore smiles, arms circled around each other's bodies. Erik couldn't hide a smile at that, one photo even held the _real _Raven, grinning ear to ear with Charles by her side ready to take on the world.

Erik found an envelope and now he wasn't one to snoop but he opened the paper anyway because something in him, his inner subconscious didn't trust. Didn't trust the house, didn't trust what it held, hell Erik didn't even know if he trusted Charles ideal. So he opened the letter, maybe hoping it would contain something that gave him reason to run away from a family.

But it didn't.

It was just a letter, written in delicate, almost beautifully messy hand writing. It was old, the letter. Probably written over five years ago, Erik's eyes scanned over it and saw it was written to Charles. Erik was half sure Charles knew what he was doing, he was sure Charles had heard his curious thoughts. He hesitated but read the letter anyway, his mind felt at ease as his eyes scanned the letter.

_Dear Charles,_

_Hello old friend. I wonder long it's been since we've talked. For me, since writing this, it's only been a few days. How long after I'm gone have you received this? Days? Months? I dread to think, years? _

_In any case if you're ready this, it means I'm dead. I'll just say it, harsh and blunt. I'm dead. I wish I wasn't, if only for you._

_I'm dead._

_And I want you to know that I'm okay, you're okay too. And I love you so much, don't doubt that. No matter how many years pass you can't ever forget that. Promise me Charlie dear. I know you will._

_I worry about you though, I really do. I think that after I'm gone you might drop into a sea of bitterness and I'm not being egotistical when I say this because I know you. You hate abandonment. But you mustn't suffer for that. Don't let that make you hard and cold, you are warm and kind and full of hope. Never lose your hope Charles._

_Don't lose your hope and never hide who you are._

_Inside you, my dear is a little boy. A little boy who was convinced he was crazy, who heard voices that weren't his own swarm his mind, a little boy who used to scream at the voices and cry and plead to make them go away, the same boy who stayed weeks in Hospital muttering thoughts and not understanding a thing. The little boy was hurt a long time ago, abused and beaten because he could hear the truth. Tested and experimented on because they couldn't accept you were different._

_You thought there was something wrong with you but nothing wrong with you, there's something right with you. _

_Inside you Charles there is a good man. I know that, you would too if you'd take time to look like the rest of us. The little boy inside you is still hurt, heal him Charles, and console him. Tell him that if he has hope there will be days he'll never forget. He'll live, find love, find family. I found the family I wanted, I found love. I was happy and I died, it's all I could have asked for. _

_I want you to be happy. After everything you deserve nothing less, you deserve more in hindsight but happiness is the best start._

_And do one more thing for me. Don't forget me. Carry me with you if you can. Don't forget me, don't forget that you can plant happiness in even the most broken of people. _

_Don't hide._

_Love, _

_Eddie Parker._

Erik felt his eyes droop; his heart sank simply because Charles wasn't as pure and childish as he seemed. Erik had wanted to protect his friend, keep him from the horrors of the world, wrap him up safely and never let evil men touch him. Something in Erik's heart died a bit as he realised how the world has the ability to fuck everyone up, no matter how good.

"He loved her, Charles did."

Raven's voice caused Erik to turn his head.

"Charles showers kindness and trust and I'm sure he's slept with plenty but he's ever only loved her." Raven gently took the letter out of Erik's hands and read over it, a smile spread over her face as if she could hear the girl's voice in her head.

"She was beautiful." Raven said softly. "Not the best looking but she was so beautiful."

"What happened?" Erik asked before stopping himself.

"She died." Raven simply, in a tone that clearly told Erik she didn't want to give any information.

Erik spared Raven one last look before he walked out of the room, he smiled at her but she didn't up from the photographs and letters, lost in memories that were so painfully old.

"You do tend to snoop a lot." Charles said when Erik passed his room. "And yes it's called snooping."

"I don't do it on purpose." Erik offered and Charles smiled at him.

But still his smile held a sadness that made Erik sick.

"Was she really as beautiful as Raven said?" Erik asked quietly, his voice soft and gentler than he'd spoken since he was a child.

"Even more so." Charles smiled lit up and Erik smiled back at him. All teeth and Charles' eyes widened and Erik could see the naivety slide back into them.

"Care to tell me about her?" Erik asked, not sure how he'd react if Charles wanted to.

"I'd rather a game of chess." Charles said, his voice broken and shaking.

Erik simply nodded.

He stayed up for six hours with the fearless leader, his blue eyes brighter with tears and Charles couldn't tell Erik how grateful he was for not mentioning it.

Erik had hoped to shield Charles from hurt, from torture, from heartache but it seemed Charles was already well versed in such things.

'Never again, I won't let anything hurt him again.' Erik thought.

'You can try.' Charles thought back.

* * *

**("Some people don't understand the promises they're making when they make them," I said.**

**"Right, of course. But you keep the promise anyway. That's what love is. Love is keeping the promise anyway."**

**― John Green, The Fault in Our Stars)**


End file.
